notes

(when things become as they are, it's like seeing through an oily lens. every process slows. my thoughts creep; i can almost feel the neurons struggling down their pathways, as if the dendrites have gone limp and the core struggles by will alone (but the neurons ARE the will, so there's nothing but pure chemistry to convey them along, anyway, so it's a futile and fruitless game trying to anthropomorphousize my brain cells))

(I need to swim out from under this weight(in all dimensions)) else I'll be trapped again and fall deeper. Again. I cannot allow that.)